Signs You’re Healing from Emotional Abuse

Healing from emotional abuse is not easy; it’s a journey filled with ups and downs, steps forward and often, steps backward. But the fact that you’re here, reading this, means you’re most likely  already on that path. Recognizing the signs of healing can be empowering. It reminds us that progress is possible, even if it doesn’t always feel like it. So, what does healing from emotional abuse look like?

1. You’re Starting to Trust Yourself Again
One of the most significant effects of emotional abuse is the damage it does to your ability to trust your own feelings and ideas. Experiencing gaslighting, belittling and/or ridicule can make you second guess even the tiniest of decisions. When you’re healing, you begin to notice moments where you trust yourself; whether it’s making a small choice without second-guessing, or listening to your gut, your intuition, or the sensations in your body, about what feels right for you. These moments are signs that you're reclaiming your sense of self.

2. You Feel More Grounded in the Present
Emotional abuse often keeps you stuck in the past, replaying painful experiences over and over. When you start to heal, you notice slowly being able to stay more present, without constantly being pulled into past memories. You may find that you’re able to enjoy small, everyday moments without feeling weighed down by what happened before and over time this increases more and more.

3. You Set and Maintain Boundaries
One of the most powerful signs of healing is the ability to set healthy boundaries; both with others, and with yourself. This one takes time, and conscious effort to master, so be gentle on yourself. If you’ve noticed that you’re becoming more confident in saying “no” or protecting your emotional energy, it’s a clear sign you’re healing and prioritizing your well-being. A saying that comes to mind here is “No is a complete sentence.” (Make sure to read our first four blog posts on Boundaries for more support on this.)

4. You’re Experiencing More Feelings of Joy and Satisfaction
Healing from emotional abuse isn’t just about moving away from pain, it’s about moving toward feeling joy. If you’re finding yourself experiencing more moments of genuine happiness, laughter, or satisfaction, that’s a powerful indicator of healing. These feelings don’t have to be constant, in fact they rarely are in anyone. But, when they start showing up more often, it’s a sign that you’re reconnecting with the positive aspects of life. It may start with small things, like enjoying your morning coffee, a quiet walk, or catching a beautiful sight and taking it in 1% more than before. These moments of contentment show that you’re creating space for happiness again.

5. You’re Experiencing Less Guilt and Shame
Emotional abuse often leaves behind feelings of guilt and shame, even when you’ve done nothing wrong. As you heal, you notice those feelings start to lessen. You begin to understand that the abuse wasn’t your fault, and these feelings are not yours to hold, they never were, they were given to you as a form of power and control. You no longer need to carry the weight of someone else’s actions on your shoulders. 

6. Your Body Feels Calmer and More at Ease
Trauma doesn’t just live in your mind—it’s stored in your body. Just like how a gazelle shakes their whole body after escaping a predator, we too need to allow trauma to move through our bodies so it doesn’t get stuck. When you’re healing, you may notice that your body starts to feel more relaxed, you experience fewer stress-related symptoms (like headaches or stomach issues), and you’re more in tune with how you feel physically. This is where somatic therapy and practices can play a powerful role in your recovery.

The Role of Therapy in Fostering Healing

Healing from emotional abuse doesn’t happen overnight, and it’s not something you have to do alone. Therapy, especially trauma-informed and somatic approaches, can provide you with the tools and support you need to heal at a deeper level. In therapy, you are supported while you explore how the abuse affected you, learn coping strategies, and reconnect with your body and emotions in a safe, compassionate environment.

Somatic therapy, in particular, helps release the trauma stored in your body by exploring your current physical sensations while remembering the traumatic events, allowing you to move through the bodily responses toward feeling more grounded and at ease. It’s a gentle but powerful approach that can help you move forward, even when words aren’t enough to process the pain you’ve been through.

Supporting Your Healing with Self-Care

While therapy is an essential part of healing, ongoing self-care is just as important. This means taking time to nurture yourself emotionally, physically, and mentally. Practices like mindful breathing, meditation, journaling, spending time in nature and connection with a compassionate person can help you stay connected to yourself and continue your healing between sessions.

Remember, healing is a journey, not a destination. Every step forward, no matter how small, is a sign of progress.

Ready to Take the Next Step in Your Healing Journey?

If you're seeing some of these signs in yourself, you’re already well on your way, take a moment to truly celebrate how far you’ve come. If you’re feeling stuck, or if you want more support as you continue to heal, we're here to help. Therapy can provide the safe space you need to explore your emotions, rebuild trust in yourself, and move forward. If you’re ready to take the next step, I invite you to book a free consultation with one of our counsellors in Sooke BC or Port Coquitlam BC. Together, we can create a path toward deeper healing and self-trust.